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Still sad

[Oct. 19th, 2005|01:01 am]

[

music

~Nickelback

]

My yet again revised school schedule

Spring 06

Economic Geography
Macroeconomic Theory
Game Theory
Intro to Advanced Mathematics
Public Economics

Summer 06

Diff Eqns ??
Linear Algebra
Econometrics

Fall 06

Economics Elective
Geography Elective
Mathematical Statistics
Advanced Calculus I

I really need to be studying for my applied nonparametrics test that I have on Thursday. I need to sell my car too.......so I can afford to pay rent for next month fun fun.......I just dont know if theres anything out there thatll make me happy. For one thing, it is as though Im working for a goal right now (going to grad school in economics) that Im not even sure I want and that just kills my motivation to do what it takes to acheive that goal. For another thing, I just cant think of anything that I can do to get people to like me......Ive tried being different levels of myself....some close to the real me.....others not so close....and none of that seems to work. And its not that Im glum all day.....I mean I feign enough enthusiasm everyday to make it seem like Im okay to most people with whom I have casual interactions. Right now Im envisioning a life where I lay down in bed while watching the Price is Right and eating some Ramen soup.......part of me would like to be a hermit who works at Albertsons to sustain his lifestyle....I gained 50 pounds in like 6 months this past year....I was so much healthier and marginally happier last Fall.....bleh.....I dont talk to my father anymore.....he lost interest and I lost patience.....I think hes regretful now and I still have a (probably irrational) fear that hes going to kill me......Ive had this fear that my father was going to murder me since I was like 14 or so.....it actually worries me that he knows I live in Tallahassee...but not too much....I think Ive come to comfortable terms that if something happened to me Ive led at least a marginally influential life..Im probably paranoid......there goes that Nickelback song again.....hes a teen rebel and shes a teen babe who likes the rebels.....he just got his license back and so he picked her up (she sneaks out) so that they can fool around.....is that what teenage life is supposed to be like? Did I miss out? Im never going to have that period of my life back.....and now my college days are coming to an end and Im sure Im missing out on things as we speak.....I have 22 bottles of liquor.....but even if I could throw a party here I would only be able to muster up 4 people to invite and only 2 would come.....how cool am I?

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[Jul. 24th, 2005|02:27 pm]

[	mood	\|	cheerful	]
[	music	\|	Nickelback Never Again	]

~Got a 1280 on my GRE (520 V 760 M) with a 5.5/6.0 writing score....decent enough to make me not take it again.....plus I think the 760 Math was a fluke so I dont want to test my luck.

~Applied to the University of Minnesota's Humphrey Institute for public affairs....I think this will be the only program Ill apply to....I also think its the only program that I really have any desire to complete...I do enjoy transportation but I think that I would prefer looking at a wide array of public programs and evaluating their relative worths. I was never really into that whole specialization thing.....Id rather be a jack of all trades. So Im going to visit Minneapolis in 2 weeks to make sure that I like the city well enough and then Ill be set to move there in December or June....not sure which....I figure even if I dont get in (or dont get funding) I can at least work up state residency and take courses as a non-admitted student.....Im really exicted about the program!!!!!!!!! There are some awesome courses that I want to take like Education policy and Methods of Poverty Reduction! I love applied courses.......and Ill finally have cold weather again. Annnnnnnnnnnd best of all Ill be living in an urban environment once again so there will be things to do.

~I cant wait for the new Nickelback cd and for them to go on tour again!!! Thatll be fun......Ill see them in Atlanta or somewhere close to here. Theyre my favorite band I havent seen them live yet. But I will!

~My Final Fall Sched:

Economic Geography
Economics of State/Local Govt
Applied Regression Methods
Mathematical Statistics
Applied Nonparametrics

~I got a job at an Albertsons liquor store in the ritzy part of Tallahassee.

"If you're blue and you don't know
where to go to why don't you go
where fashion sits
Puttin' on the Ritz"

Right.....anyways Im still waiting for them to call me back about the drug test.......Im a little worried since its been a while....maybe I had a poppy seed bagel in the morning :O? I dont remember. Its really awesome as far as scheduling goes though......its 3 nights a week for about 18 hours a week....wont interfere with any of my courses....and dont even think about robbing me cause if you do Ill spork your ass.....yup and believe me there will be a possibility that iot may kind of hurt!

~I want a steady volunteer position for that Fall......it will look good for my application to UMN....it just has to be around 5 hours a week :O/ Between work, German, and school I dont have too much time to spare......I donno......I think Ill look more once I start to work.

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(no subject)	[Jun. 12th, 2005\|03:51 am]
I dont know why Im updating this......noone reads it anyways.....maybe Ill read it one day. How do we build a sense of community? Well I suppose there cant be community without attachment anyways. Nevermind. This was a stupid tangent to go off on. I really dont have much to say.
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See told you I would never update!

[May. 28th, 2005|10:52 pm]

[	mood	\|	bouncy	]
[	music	\|	System of a Down	]

And I dont feel like updating tonight.

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[May. 1st, 2005|12:02 am]

[	mood	\|	studious	]
[	music	\|	Eminem~ Ass Like That (lol)	]

~They need to charge that dumb Georgia lady who had cold-feet......levy some kind of large fine on her for all the labor and squandered money sunk into the investigation to find her.....would her goal not of been accomplished by leaving a I have cold-feet note? What did she think she was going to get away with the kidnap story?

~Got a 930 on my practice GRE.......lol......not cool seeing how Im aiming for a 1350-1450

~Ummmm school starts next Monday.........the 9th I think it is?

~I think my next apt is going to have an art deco theme......or a modern art theme......if I can afford it.

~5 full days of studying for the GRE starts now.

~Thats all for now :O)

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Collective Soul Concert

[Apr. 25th, 2005|09:51 pm]

[	mood	\|	content	]
[	music	\|	Collective Soul~ Better Now	]

So hmmm I cant sleep.....not a good thing......I have a final I need to get up early for so I can study in the morning.

Anyways I had a blast at this Collective Soul concert in Atlanta and since I cant sleep Im going to write about that for awhile.

So I bought this ticket to see Collective Soul in Hotlanta GA (bought them about 4 weeks ago)........but it was this past Saturday.......the w/e before finals and I tried really hard to sell it but I couldnt get a buyer and then my hotel reservation couldnt be cancelled so I was like fuck it Im going to go.....I mean why not? In case people are wondering why Id need a hotel room Atlanta is about a 7 hour drive for me and the concert didnt get out til like 11. Alright so I leave around 1 PM (for an 8 oclock show......cutting it close I was.....talk like Yoda I must not) so yea I get there and I have to urinate so bad........I didnt stop as I was driving (didnt want to miss any of the NFL draft coverage on my radio LOL).........so I get to the Woodruff center and I run to the bathroom....which was located in a retarded spot and only had one urinal! (Wonderful to urinate while having 5 guys waiting behind you who really need to use the urinal......and if you havent met him yet Id like to introduce you to my friend, sarcasm).....anyways I had my cool mini camera in my pocket and I see a sign that says absolutely no cameras and Im like oh shit I guess I should run and put this back in my car so Im not late for the show......and then I get in and noone searches me......stupid people with camera phones got awesome pics........but did I? Nope.....I couldve taken mini movies too! Ohwell cant dwell on that......anyways so the concert was really awesome......they played the show with the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra in the background......and they played all my favorite songs! Yea just an awesome show.

Man! There were so many hot girls there.....guess I know why they call it Hotlanta......wow. lol.....Anyways I was really surprised about the diversity in the crowd.....you know for a 90s alternative band......I loved it.....people of all ages and races together.....lots of interracial couples too and they gave me this program with all these cultural facilities in Atlanta and yea Im pretty jealous....Id gotta say I was pretty impressed by Atlanta...I think sometimes I have this Northern elitist prejudice against the South and thats really stupid.....Atlanta really opened my eyes to some of my errors......I really would love to live in Atlanta (or any city for that matter)....I know I only got a small limited view of the city this past trip but still impressed I was! Maybe Ill consider GA Tech? Stranger things have happened I suppose.

Well after the concert someone minorly bumped into me but there wasnt any damage done to either my car or her car so I let her go.....she was so worried too......poor thing......but yea.......not even a scratch...lol probably wouldve put a damper in my trip if my car had gotten dented or scratched. Awesome concert! Did I mention that?

So the concert ends about 11 PM but I dont leave Atlanta Proper til about ummmmm 130 AM lmao.....for a geography major I get lost easily :O/ then I go to my hotel and I check in and Im starving (all I had that day was a cookie) so I go to IHOP and have a pretty good (more importantly cheap) BLT. I go to get into my room and the elevatorr breaks on my on the second floor....the door wouldnt close and then the elevator starts making Squeaking noises and Im like......uh oh.....I just run off the thing (practically leaped out of it lol)......and climbed 9 flights of stairs.......I stayed at the Best Western by the airport cause you usually can get cheap nice rooms by airports.....and this thing was really close to the airport......like right next to it...which might annoy some people but you see I have a thing for airports so I was in bliss admiring the country's busiest int. airport :O)

Anyways so Im supposed to be studying at the hotel but the allure of cable tv was too strong......I mean Emeril was making Custard pie! BAM! BAM! BAAM! How could I not watch?

Got an A in the class that ended today.....probably will get another A in a class tomorrow......just a bit worried about Friday's probability final. But I have to get my math/stat skills up if I ever want to study transportation.

I think Im going to do a thesis working on developing a methodology for ranking Light Rail Transit systems in North America. Ive updated my schedule to reflect the fact that it appears that Im now going to get bright futures:

Summer

US/Canada
Intro Applied Stat
Linear Alg
GIS

Fall (AKA semester of no free time)

Light Rail Thesis I
Transport Issues
Economic Geography
Applied Nonparametrics
Math Stat
Applied Regression

Spring

Light Rail Thesis II
Physics A
Multivariate Stat
German? or some super easy class or Transport Geog?

GRE is May 5th.....still trying to get out of coming home so I can actually study.

List of programs Im applying to:

Transport Engineering:

UC Berkeley
Purdue
U Illinois
GA Tech?
UMinnesota (Dual Master: Transport Engineering/Urban Planning)

Geography:

Buffalo
Ohio State

Yea this has been enough.

~R~

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(no subject)

[Apr. 15th, 2005|07:08 am]

[	mood	\|	anxious	]
[	music	\|	Lunasa~The Minor Bee	]

I always find a hair in my food.

I like Celtic music.

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Classes and Etc.

[Apr. 7th, 2005|03:39 am]

[	mood	\|	chipper	]
[	music	\|	Jet~ Cold Hard Bitch	]

I updated the rest of my course schedule for the next yr to reflect my not having bright futures and needing to work full-time starting next Spring.

SUMMER

Linear Alg
Stat Intro
GIS
US and Canada

Fall

Transit Planning
DIS (Light Rail Transit)
Econ Geog
Applied NonParametrics
Applied Regression
Math Stat

Spring

(Physics A)
Multivariate Analysis

Just in case anyone cares :OP

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[Apr. 4th, 2005|03:44 am]

Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink!</p></td></tr>

300 Questions Self-Survey *
Created by stardrops-xo and taken 36 times on bzoink!
a b o u t \| m e *
What time is it now?	250 AM
What's you name?	Starts with an R
What's you nickname(s)?	Starts with an R
What's your birthday?	December 25th
How old are you?	21
What's your location?	Tallahassee FL
What grade are you in?	lol Am in da Furst Grade
What school do you attend?	Florida State
Are you in highschool?	Sure Why not
Do you like it?	Ive been worse places
Are you in college/name?	See above
Do you like it?	See Above
How tall are you?	6 feet
How much do you weigh?	Im average
What is your shoe size?	13ish? I think
What is you hair color?	Brown
What color are your eyes?	Greenish
Do you wear glasses/contacts?	Contacts
What is your favorite hair color of the opposite sex?	I like Black Curly Hair Right now I think
What is your favorite eye color of the opposite sex?	Brown
What is a physical turnon to you?	Nice Smile. Not too teethy too.
What is a physical turnoff to you?	Body Stench is bad....Shower Everyday People!
What is a personal turnon to you?	Nice Heart/Good Intentions
What is a personal turnoff to you?	Overly Trendy People
What is your favorite band?	Nickelback!!!!!!!!!!!
What is your favorite singer?	The dude from Nickelback!!!!!!!!
What is you skin type/color?	Im quite White
What is your heritage?	Quite White
What is your race?	White
What physical trait do you like most about yourself?	New Yawk Accent!
What personal trait do you like most about yourself?	Randomness :O)
What physical trait do others like most about you?	Id have to ask I think??
What personal trait do others like most about you?	See above
r e l a t i o n s h i p s *
Are you single or taken?	Single
Do you have a crush?	Nope
What is their name?	Cant you see my above answer??
Do they know?	Sure Why not.
What is your dream [guy/girl]'s strong personality traits?	Hmmm you have to repeat to get to 300 questions I guess
What are your dream [guy/girl]'s strong physical features?	Repeater!
Have you ever gong out with someone?	nope well not in that sense lol
How many people?	zip
Have you ever cheated?	nope
Have you ever been cheated on?	nope
Have you ever kissed someone of the opposite sex [not relative]?	nope lol Im too cool for you :OP
Have you ever hugged someone of the opposite sex [not relative]?	YES!!!!!!!! Alright I got to answer a yes
Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex [not relative]?	No
Have you ever hugged someone of the same sex [not relative]?	Hmmm not sure?
Have you ever made out with anyone?	nope
Have you ever been in a 3(+) some?	nope
Is it ok to flirt if you have a [boy/girl] friend?	Define flirt.
Is it ok to cheat if you have a [boy/girl] friend?	nope
What is you dream date?	Day at a theme park I think.
Where is your dream date?	See above
Where do you want to get married?	Ice Palace in Quebec!!!!!!!!!!!
When do you want to get married?	4 yrs give or take
How many kids do you want to have?	2
Favorite girl's name(s):	Anything unique
Favorite guy's name(s):	Less unique......umm Zach is a cool name
Preferable mate's height:	5-8
Preferable mate's age [ in compaison to your own; # of years apart ] ?	Less than 10.....No Demi Moore for me
Preferable mate's weight:	I dont care
Have you gone to 1st in a relationship?	nope
Have you gone to 2nd in a relationship?	nope
Have you gone to 3rd in a relationship?	nope
Have you gone all the way in a relationship?	nope
Do you use sex toys?	nope
Have you ever stripped in front of a member of the opposite sex?	nope
Have you ever stripped in front of a member of the same sex?	nope
Have you ever played a game that involved the removal of clothing?	nope
Was it with members of the opposite sex?	nope
Have you ever gona skinny dipping?	nope
With other people?	nope
How many?	nope
With members of the opposite sex?	nope
Who [was/were] [it/they]?	nope
How romantic are you on a scale from 1-10?	Ill stick with the safe answer: 5
What would be the most romantic situation?	Someplace where its cold and snowing outside with lots of bright lights and then me and me date are inside drinking cocoa by a fireplace.
What is the most romantic situation you have ever been in?	Square Dancing in 4th grade with my first ever crush! Ive had other situations since then but that still was a fond memory :O)
If single, do you want a [girl/boy] friend?	ehhh......Im not closed to the possibility
Have you ever played spin the bottle?	nope
What is love?	A deep understanding
T h i s \| o r \| T h a t *
test or quiz?	test
love or lust?	love
guys or gurls?	gurls
aeropostale or american eagle?	neither
abercrombie [ and fitch ] or hollister?	neither
hard rock or alternative?	Nickelback! Whatever you want to consider them
soul or blues?	Soul
classical or modern?	Classical
hip-hop or rap?	Rap
daning or singing?	Dancing
chocolate or vanilla?	Vanilla
apples or oranges?	Oranges
fruit or vegetables?	Fruit
early morning or late-night?	Late-night......into morning
this or that?	this
hip or hop?	hop
hot or sexy?	hot.......Canadian Bartenders are HOT! My new saying lol
black or white?	grey
red or pink?	red
roses or carnations?	rose
blue or red?	blue
Eminem or Snoop Dogg?	Eminem
Movies at home or in the cinema?	Cinema
alone or with others?	Others
evens or odds?	Evens
2nd or 3rd?	3rd
basketball or baseball?	I like the other two sports.....hockey and football
soccer or tennis?	nope
football or rugby?	football
cartoons or anime?	cartoons......Anime causes seizures!
french or spanish?	French
california or floria?	FL
disneyworld or disneyland?	World
Six Flags or Bush Gardens?	BUSCH GARDENS!
Virginia or Maryland?	Virginia is for lovers!
reading or writing?	writing
acting or directing?	acting
one or two?	one
single or taken?	single
planes or trains?	planes......though LRTs are cool
britney or christina?	neither
H a v e / D o \| Y o u *
smoked?	Heck no!
done pot?	Heck no!
done an illegal drugs?	nope
drink?	yes I have
gotten drunk?	yes I have
[girl] given head?
[guy] gotten head?	Okay yea the author has sex on the brain now.....this is fun :sarcasm:
masturbated?	na
had sex?	na
cheated?	nope
lied?	probably
gotten high?	nope

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[Apr. 4th, 2005|03:38 am]

300 Questions Self-Survey *
Created by stardrops-xo and taken 36 times on bzoink!
A r e / H a v e \| Y o u *
smart?	I aint no dumb fools you cow hopper!
funny?	Some might be inclined to make that judgement.
hot?	Anytime temp goes above 75
pretty?	ehhh
preppy?	no
energetic?	at night.....we wont discuss mornings
calm?	yea most of the time
sad?	no
happy?	yes
trustworthy?	yes
a good secret keeper?	yes I am......I listen to people :O)
romantic?	probably
dumb?	Now I says b4: I aint no dumb fools you cow hopper!
blonde?	nope
a good kisser?	maybe?
a good [boy/girl] friend?	I probably would be
trustworty?	yes
quiet?	depends
loyal?	yes
trusting?	yes
pessimistic?	LMAO I just got that vision of Jerry Seinfeld when he tries to be unfunny in my head!!!!! Too funny!!!!! lol
optimistic?	The possibilities are endless! The world is but a canvas to our imaginations.
a teacher's pet?	I was in elementary school
stuck up?	no
a nerd?	not really a nerd.....Im unique
a computer geek?	no
a dumbass?	Now how manys times must n I go n repeats meself.
a smartass?	I like sarcastic humour
slutty?	no lol
horny?	no
perverted?	no
religious?	Agnostic
down to earth?	halfway
calm?	Question Repeater!
wild?	I prefer Adventurous
illegal?	Am I illegal? Oh yea All my friends have done hard time for hangin wit me
rich?	no
lucky?	somewhat
fun to be around?	sure
athletic?	I used to be
F a v o r i t e s *
color	dark green
food	ummm cannolis, white pizza, bread of all sorts
retauraunt?	Ummmm Carrabbas (Sp??)
word?	Right now its Zoinks
phrase?	Hot as a Canadian Bartender!
saying?	Im not sure right now
quote?	See Above
website?	webmail.fsu.edu
radio-station?	VH1 Radio
actor?	Jon Lovitz
actress?	Hmmmm not sure
celebrity [male] ?	SA
celebrity [female] ?	SA
time of the day?	Night
day of the week?	Friday
month of the year?	December
season?	Winter
type of flower?	Something Blue.....and covered in rain
type of tree?	Big ole Pine
friend?	Jennifer right now
teacher?	Prof Eddy Rules!
school?	Uhhh??? Go School!
class?	Morality and Ethics so far
subject?	Geography
animal?	Cats are awesome
eye color?	Brown
eye color on the opposite sex?	Brown
hair color?	Brown
hair color on the opposite sex?	Black........maybe red
body part?	Eyes
body part of the opposite sex?	Eyes
relative?	Ummmm
cousin?	Dont have one?
sibling?	Dont have one? Unless hes been what moves in the attic at night.
parent?	Mother
book?	Hot Zone.....I also liked Streetcar named Desire
tv show?	Critic! Ummm Daily Show
holiday?	Xmas
weather?	Snow
channel?	Food Network, Comedy Central, MSNBC
store?	Frame Shops.....ummm Atlas Stores are cool.
shampoo?	Pantene
conditioner?	Tresemme Tresemme Ouuulala
boy's name?	Question Repeater!
girl's name?	Question Repeater!
C l o s i n g \| R e m a r k s *
Are you hungry?	Nope
Are you thirsty?	nope
What are you wearing?	comfortable stuff
Do you want to take another survey?	NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
What taste is in your mouth?	milk
Are you bored?	not really
Are you releaved this is almost over?	yes
Do you know how many questions were on this?	Title says 300
Did you understand what everything meant?	I know all
Do you know what 420 means?	except this
What is the time now?	Clocks broken......and that
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

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